Dr Konoharu: and Confessions of a Ninja
by WerdnaChi
Summary: Dr. Konoharu, Konoha village's finest Physchiatrist, has seem interesting days listening to the problems of fellow Konoha shinobis...LOL


[[Author's note: My first humor fanfic. Be sure to check out my other fanfic: Konoha's Canine Genin: Inuzuka Kiba. Well, this is my try at Dr. Konoharu, a shinobi psychiatrist of Konoha. Daily, he faces challenges of everyday shinobis...]]  
  
Inside of the Konoha's largest and finest Shinobi Hospital, room 232: Psychiatry, Dr. Konoharu took a seat in his velvet chair. It was another fine day in Konoha and, Dr Konoharu, was in his Psychiatrist office awaiting his next patient. Dr. Konoharu twiddled his brown mustache as he pulled out the agenda.  
  
"Let's see who we have here..." Dr. Konoharu fingered through his agenda notebook. "Ah! Hyuuga Neji, 8:30 A.M. appointment with me a one hour treatment."  
  
It was about 8:25 and the morning sun was hanging in the air.  
  
"Hmm...Hyuuga Neji, isn't he that kid that can use the Byakugan eye thing?" Dr. Konoharu thought to himself aloud. Dr. Konoharu had been the Konoha Village's finest Psychiatrist, he had treated many post-mission trauma Jounins and Chuunins, and so it was unusual to have a Genin signed up for treatment.  
  
Neji walked into the room with a confident stride, "Hello, Dr. Konoharu."  
  
"Ah! Hyuuga Neji, second year Genin, a fine one at that from the news I've been hearing..."  
  
"Hmph..." Neji replied coldly to the comment.  
  
Seeing that this chit-chat would lead no where, Dr. Konoharu decided to go straight to the point, "So, Neji, I am reading your application and it says that you applied for treatment under 'Disclosed Reasons'. Now...could you explain to me what that means?"  
  
Neji twitched in his seat. He leaned over the desk and seemed to hesitate, "Listen, um, Dr. Konoharu...you have to promise, what is said here never leaves this room."  
  
"Oh, no problem, Neji! That's my number one policy, never divulge patients information to the public- I would never do that." Dr. Konoharu assured Neji.  
  
Neji seemed to ease just a little bit. "Well, I guess I should tell you why I am here..." It was obvious to Dr. Konoharu that Neji was having a hard time getting started.  
  
"Neji, if it helps...you can lie down on that couch-seat over there. Specially made for my patients!" Dr. Konoharu smiled while pointing out the comfy looking blue couch-seat.  
  
Neji walked over to the couch seat and lied down. He took a deep breath and soon he started to speak, "Well...it's as if some sort of 'inner me' has come to rise within myself...I am beginning to enter a stage where I am becoming something I had never seen in my self..."  
  
"Interesting...could you explicate this 'inner me' that you have just discovered?" Dr. Konoharu tried to pry the info out of Neji.  
  
"It happened just a month ago. I was walking through the village and I saw the private women's-only bathtub. You know the one next to the Ichiruka Ramen place..."  
  
"Yeah, of course I do." Dr. Konoharu sent is wife there whenever he wanted her to calm down.  
  
"Well, last month, I was walking past the wome's-only baths and I found myself uncontrollably running into the bushes behind the building. A burning passion...a burning desire overwhelmed my senses and I--, I--." Neji had a hard time with his confession.  
  
"And? What happened?"  
  
Neji blurted, "AND THEN I USED BYAKUGAN TO SEE ALL THE NAKED LADIES BEHIND THE WALLS OF THE PRIVATE BATHS! I DID IT! YES I USED BYAKUGAN TO SEE IT ALL, THE SUPPLE BREASTS THAT I CANNOT LIVE WITHOUT-".  
  
"Oh, my.."  
  
Neji continued, "I cannot CONTROL myself, Doctor! Every bathroom, bath house, or home that a women is in...I JUST HAVE TO USE MY BYAKUGAN AND WATCH THEIR CURVY SENSATIONAL BODY! OH IT SHIVERS ME SO! *sniff* I JUST HAVE TO SEE THEIR HAIR FLOW DOWN TO THEIR SCRUMPTIOUS BOSOMS!"  
  
"Um- How frequent would you say you do this?"  
  
"Every waking moment of my life...I hide myself in the bushes and I will sit for hours and watch the women undress themselves and *ooooh* how wonderful..." Neji was in a whole different world now.  
  
-------------------Flashback------- Neji made sure nobody was looking and jumped into a clump of bushes. "Byakugan!" Neji's eyes veins popped out as he stared into the wall of the women's bathhouse. A string of drool was present. Hours passed by. Neji was still crouching and watching in bliss... ------------------end of flashback----  
  
"Dr. Konoharu! WHY? WHY DO I DO THIS? I even stopped, yes, STOPPED training so I can sit and watch these women..." Neji desperately cried out.  
  
"Well, Neji...you are thirteen?"  
  
"Yes, doctor..."  
  
"All I have to say is...puberty."  
  
"Puberty?" Neji looked confused.  
  
"Yes a stage basically where a man grows and so do the sexual desires. In fact, the sexual curiosity might be so overwhelming it will ruin your reasoning and common sense!" Dr. Konoharu explained.  
  
Neji lit up with a look of epiphany, "Oh! That explains it!"  
  
"Yes, puberty explains your cause to go peeping-Tom at every 37 women's bathhouse in Konoha in a span of 24 hours a day."  
  
"No not that!" Neji remarked. "If puberty takes the better sense of me then..."  
  
"Then?"  
  
"Well you see, I was walking by this men's only bathhouse and—"Neji began.  
  
"WOAH! MEN'S DEPARTMNT?! YOUR IN THE WRONG DEPARTMENT! OUT WITH YOU! SHOO SHOO! THAT'S SOMETHING I DO NOT WANT TO KNOW." Dr. Konoharu grabbed a fly swatter and shooed the Genin out the room.  
  
Neji began glow red as he began to run out the office.  
  
It was just another day in Dr. Konoharu's Shinobi psychiatry.  
  
Next chapter: 


End file.
